Tag Archives: marvel comics

Marvel Muck Up

Cyclops Was Right

Marvel Comics has become a mess, thanks to a pair of comic books in its timelines. First is Civil War II. With one more issue to go, we already know Tony Stark is either missing or dead from the conflict between him and Captain Marvel. We

 have the new ‘Ironheart’, Riri, and Victor Von Doom of all people assuming the role of Iron Man. Ulysses, the Inhuman precog the series is about, sees a vision where New Jersey is a wasteland and only Old Man Logan is there. Logan, though, blames Stark for the mess but said he provoked ‘her’. Ulysses assumes this is Carol. I think we are going to find it revealed the ‘her’ is someone else – Storm, Emma, Medusa being three likely candidates beyond Carol to be provoked. 

Maybe this revelation and/or Ulysses death will end this copy of Minority Report that has everyone acting like idiots throughout the series. The characterization has been beyond poor in many of the main antagonists of this snooze fest. Sure, Hawkeye killed Bruce Banner…who is already back as a zombie, and we’ve lost War Machine and Tony. Instead of a focus on the Inhumans vs Mutants conflict, though, we had to bring about a convoluted predestination theory des machina in Ulysses. 

But they have screwed up that fight: Inhumans vs Mutants. In fact, I saw they screwed it up worse with Death of X, which is really the death of one of my favorite characters in Marvel, Cyclops. The problem is, Cyclops supposedly did something ‘really bad (TM)’. Except, not only was it not him but Emma using an illusion of Scott Summers, but it wasn’t bad!

Emma recruited a transmuter, Alchemy, to her team and from there transmuted one of the two Terrigen Mist clouds to an inert gas. Yes, the Inhumans were pissed about this. But where does this make all of humankind despise him? He supposedly did a horrible thing, but…well, he really didn’t. Nor did Emma, though the last panels of Death of X make me think Emma has snapped while she was telling Alex Summers, Scott’s brother, what had really happened.

Add to this panels from Extraordinary X-Men, where Magik was pissed at Scott. She was there, and helping the illusion! This is a blatant problem. No, this does not work at all and has turned the whole Inhuman vs Mutant thing into a farce. Marvel could have done this much, much different and it would have made Scott look like a true villain. Transforming the mist is where they got it wrong.

Let me explain a bit. To make Scott this horrid person they want him to have become, despite X-Men #600 where Scott becomes MLK, the mist transformation has to have gone wrong. Alchemy transforms the mist…and suddenly hundreds of thousands of humans become infected with the M-Pox before Alchemy gets the cloud to be inert. THAT is what should have happened. When Magik, who is along for this event, discovers it, Emma knocks Magik out before Magik can kill her Scott construct. That would give Magik reason to have the seething hatred of Scott, not realizing it was Emma’s plan. That would make the reactions in Extraordinary and Uncanny X-Men logical. It would be a good catalyst to snap Emma’s mind, too, knowing it was really her plan and she screwed up. Emma can form the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants, to fight the Inhumans. 

Marvel didn’t do that, and I am afraid their reasoning behind Inhumans vs X-Men (IvX) is going to have another bad catalyst. Suddenly, the mutants only have hours to live, so attack the Inhumans? Eh…that sounds like another deus ex machina. Which, frankly, is another bad idea from the House of Ideas.

Hopefully, when the X-titles return, things will straighten out from these convoluted plot lines. 

I would like to remind Marvel of another thing. Mutants have long been the mirror of oppressed minorities, perceived or real, around the world. Blacks, LGBT, etc. have all seen parts of their struggle in the mutant struggle. That’s the beauty of Marvel. They have slowly changed our own world with their comics in a much more subtle way than the heavy hammer currently being employed. Inhumans were the environmentalists. Pollution made the Inhumans sick at one point in time, which is why they left for the moon. I am no environmentalist, mind you, because I think the leadership is fraudulently covering up their socialism, but move the Inhumans back to that role, Marvel. You might have a hit, instead of hate towards them.

 

I Wanna Be Tony Stark

(Apologies to Nickelback)

I’m through with standin’ in lines to clubs I’ll never get in
It’s like the bottom of the ninth and I’m never gonna win
This life hasn’t turned out
Quite the way I want it to be
(Tell me what you want)
I want a brand new house on an episode of Cribs
And a bathroom I can play baseball in
And a king size tub
Big enough for ten plus me
(Yeah, so what you need?)
I need a a credit card that’s got no limit
And a big Quinjet with a bedroom in it
Gonna join the mile high club
At thirty-seven thousand feet
(Been there, done that)
I want a new battle suit with many weapons
My own  co-stars that can kick some ass
Someone like Pepper
Or James Rhodes War Machine
(So how you gonna do it?)
I’m gonna trade this life
For fortune and fame
I’d even cut my hair
And change my name
‘Cause we all just wanna be Tony Stark
And live in ocean houses, drivin’ fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the booze come cheap
We’ll all stay skinny ’cause we just won’t eat
And we’ll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger’s gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny with her bleach blond hair
And well, hey, hey, I wanna be Tony Stark
Hey, hey, I wanna be Tony Stark
I wanna be great like Cap without the hassles
Build eight drone suits that love to beat up Hydra
Sign a couple autographs
So I can eat my meals for free
(I’ll have the veggie shwarma, ha, ha)
I’m gonna dress my ass with the latest fashion
Get a front door key to the Playboy mansion
Gonna date a centerfold that loves
To blow my money for me
(So how you gonna do it?)
I’m gonna trade this life
For fortune and fame
I’d even cut my hair
And change my name
‘Cause we all just wanna be Tony Stark
And live in ocean houses, drivin’ fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the booze comes cheap
We’ll all stay skinny ’cause we just won’t eat
And we’ll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger’s gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny with her bleach blond hair
And we’ll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary of today’s who’s who
They’ll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody’s got an Avenger on speed dial
Well, hey, hey, I wanna be Tony Stark
I’m gonna fight those villains, offend the Senate
Gonna pop my pills from a Pez dispenser
Get washed-up heroes washin’ all my cars
Invent solutions, fight the press so they report it right
Well, we all just wanna be Tony Stark
And live in ocean houses, drivin’ fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the booze comes cheap
We’ll all stay skinny ’cause we just won’t eat
And we’ll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger’s gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny with her bleach blond hair
And we’ll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary of today’s who’s who
They’ll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody’s got an Avenger on speed dial
Well, hey, hey, I wanna be Tony Stark
Hey, hey, I wanna be Tony Stark